roswell recap - season 1 - episode 2

Season1, Episode 2 - The Morning After (scandalous title!)

I am actually following through with my promise (to myself, who else would care?) to re-cap every episode of the show Roswell, a little gem I found on Netflix. To learn more about my ridiculous love of teen soaps and now, Roswell, read this post. Also, this site is where I snaked the screenshots from. Big ups to them.

Liz ponders the idea of Max staying up all night thinking of her as she does with him. Cue scene of Max snoring. Then someone tries to break in Max’s room, but it is just Michael. Why don’t the bedrooms of TV characters ever have screens on their windows? Michael is too juiced to sleep. Crazy alien stuff is brewing. 

Maria starts calling aliens Czechoslovakians. Makes sense. A new teacher wonders where Michael is and why he isn’t in class, which Liz finds weird. No, liz. That’s her job. She’s supposed to ask where students are when they aren’t in class. Anyways, it is the lady who played Dexter’s wife before she was murdered on Dexter. Not pertinent to the storyline, but I thought you might be interested.

Maria wants to tell Alex. OMFG. Never trust teenage girls with your life shattering secrets, aliens. Also, I still hate Maria’s hair. Kyle is still way into Liz, but Liz not so much. She has caught alien fever. Alien LOVE fever. Liz blows him off in favor of seeing what the new teacher has in her hands, which ends up being Michael’s school file. 

Liz freaks a bit and goes to Michael’s house. It isn’t a house, so much as it is a trailer, where his foster dad sits about in his boxers. Super classy digs. If I were a foster parent, I think I would get pissed about every foster child in every tv show ever. They always live in trailers and drink beer for breakfast. Michael thanks Liz for her keen observational skills. And for not vomiting at the sight of his foster dad in boxers. That second part was inferred.

roswell recap - season 1 - pilot

I am actually following through with my promise (to myself, who else would care?) to re-cap every episode of the show Roswell, a little gem I found on Netflix. To learn more about my ridiculous love of teen soaps and now, Roswell, read this post. Also, this site is where I snaked the screenshots from. So, big ups to them.

Season 1, Episode 1 – Pilot (super clever title!)

So, the show starts with a cute brunette writing a journal entry about how 5 days ago she died and then things “got really weird.” Oh, teens!

 

Then we see the same girl, Liz, working in a ridiculous alien waitress uniform, messing with the head of some tourists concerning a fake alien photo. The tourists look like cartoon characters from the cartoon Doug.  Another waitress tells her that a hot guy named Max is checking her out again and she’s all NO WAY, but he totally is. Max is the Luke Perry of the show as he looks like a 30 year old playing a 16 year old. Thanks to Wikipedia I see that he was around 26 when this show was on, so not too far off there. I digress. The other waitress is Maria. Based on her name and the fact that she suddenly starts speaking Spanish, my guess is that she’s going to be the wacky Latina best friend on the show. Nice of the WB not to play into stereotypes. One other thing: she has really terrible hair. 

Two burly dudes argue over something(probably who had more fries) and they have a gun! People in Roswell are serious about their diner food, yo. The gun goes off and Liz goes down, so I guess she got shot. Hot Max runs to her, much to the chagrin of his spikey haired friend. He rips her uniform open and at first I’m like what the whaaat, but then he puts his hand over her gun shot and heals her, while seeing flashes of each other when they were kids. I guess he’s pretty much been stalking her since they were 5. Seriously, though, the wound is gone, so that's pretty nuts. He breaks a ketchup bottle and tells her she broke it when she fell. Then to be real cool and secretive, he and his friend run out of the crowded restaurant IN FRONT OF EVERYONE and peel out in a jeep. Yup, non-suspect and playing it real cool.

Can I digress for a moment about the sheriff?

guilty pleasures

If you follow me on Twitter, you may know I have a mega embarrassing guilty pleasure: I love soap operas aimed at teenagers. Not the daily things your mother (or my one college roommate who seemed to be a disgruntled 45 yr old housewife stuck in a 20 year old's body) used to watch that are dwindling in variety in favor of such great shows as The Chew (I kid, that show is the WORST), but the hour long shows that are generally featured on The CW or Fox. I know. It is awful, but I love them. Maybe it is nostalgia or a female Peter Pan syndrome of sorts, but even at 26 I still love me some teen soaps. From Dawson's Creek to Vampire Diaries, I have seen them all (not really, but probably embarrassingly close).

Oh, Dawson. You oversized head heartthrob of the 90s.

So, what does that have to do with the bloggy boo? Well, Netflix recently struck a deal with the CW so they have a Mecca when it comes to teen soaps, but they also have old school ones that aired on the WB back in the late 90s. Little secret: if I have nothing to do and/or I am feeling under the weather, I have been known to stay in bed all morning and pound episodes. Did I just liken tv shows to beer? Yes. In honor of the time spent hating to love said shows, I have decided to delve back into the world of reviews and do a humorous episode guide for a series. My first crop of reviews will center on the wonderfully bizarre (and equally addictive) Roswell, which Netflix recommended I watch one day. Thank you, Netflix.

Sci-fi...hot alien style.

In case you are unfamiliar(let's face it, that's probably everyone), it is a story about Roswell, New Mexico and hot aliens. No, seriously. They're supposed to be teens, so I might sound a little Polanski on that, but I use the term "teens" loosely as I am pretty sure the main guy is in his late 20s playing a 16 year old. I like it better that way, so I don't feel like a creepster being all "damn, he's hot."

So check back often for episode reviews and if you feel particularly adventurous, check the show out for yourself. I'm almost done with season one and it is terrible...or terribly awesome. The first couple of reviews should be up within the week! Stay embarrassed, my friends. I know I will.